As we enter AEW’s busiest season – the All In to All Out to WrestleDream to Full Gear to World’s End Incredicoaster – just know that I’m am writing this piece, this preview to AEW’s “WrestleMania,” while dealing with two cats. Yup. You read that right. Two. Cats.
One is old and doesn’t want to play. The other is young and wants nothing more than to constantly harass its elder. Yes, Matt “Two Cats” Fowler is having a tough go of things. If only they could settle things the way all things should be settled: in the ring. In a Texas Death Match. Which is just called a Death Match here since I’m in Texas. Likewise, a Hell in a Cell Match is just called a In a Cell Match.
I'll offer All In match predictions, sure, but nothing formal (as if this is ever formal). I always hold back with AEW because it has so much TV that it’s hard to figure out the Opposite Momentum equation. That being said, we also most likely saw the last in-ring segments from Danielson and Strickland on Cardiff Dynamite this week. Likewise for Mercedes and Britt. Basically the bigger guns. I can’t imagine they’ll be on Rampage or Collision. Of course, I could just look up the spoilers since Collish was taped with Dynamite and Rampsh was taped last week. But that requires more open tabs.
I’m still going with Daniel Bryan beating Swerve (and then Swerve regaining the belt at All Out or WrestleDream). It could go either way, of course, but I think AEW, and this event, needs this ending. Selling fewer All In tickets this year, and then bringing the event back to the States next year, is seen as a step backwards for the company (despite a bigger TV deal likely headed its way) so AEW needs a “Yes!-leMania” moment. But again, they could stick with Strick.
AEW ALL IN
- Kris Statlander and Stokely Hathaway vs. Willow Nightingale and Tomohiro Ishii
This has to go to Willow and Ishii. I’d love for these two women to be on the main card but I guess we’ll be getting that at All Out in two weeks.
- Casino Gauntlet
There are 21 duderinos in this so it’s hard to pick just one, but narrowing it down I’ll just go with Adam Page since he’s so angry. What an irate fellow. And it might put him on a collision course with Swerve again.
- Mercedes Moné (AEW TBS Champion) vs. Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D.
I’ll go Moné with this one since it’s too soon to topple her and Kamille has barely had a chance to cheat on her behalf. Once Kamille pays dividends, though, then we can talk about Mercedes losing.
- Jack Perry (AEW TNT Champion) vs. Darby Allin
It would be suck butt for Darby to lose a Coffin Match but The Elite’s loss on Dynamite sets them all up for wins at All In. And Jack feels underutilized. This could be the moment he needs to make him feel more present on the roster. And as a title holder.
- MJF (AEW American Champion) vs. Will Ospreay
It would be funny if this particular title switched ALL the time. Like, any time a guy from the U.S. wins it it’s the American Championship and if it’s someone from “Elsewhere” it reverts back to being the International Championship. Now if we can just scrap the Continental Championship we’ll be in business/cooking with gas/firing on all cylinders.
Regardless, I see Ospreay winning this one.
- "Timeless" Toni Storm (AEW Women's World Champion) vs. "The Glamour" Mariah May
I can’t really call this one with confidence so I’ll hand it to May, who’s been a huge net positive for AEW’s Women’s Division. Also, I love Toni’s shtick but it’s time to have a mostly shtick-less top champ.
- The Young Bucks (AEW World Tag Team Champions) vs. FTR vs. The Acclaimed
I hate it, but I’m going with the Bucks after their big defeat in Wales. Plus, one heel and two faces in a triple threat (usually) always favors the heel. I realize I have a lot of heels winning right now and so I’m automatically wrong about some of these.
- Chris Jericho (FTW Champion) vs. Hook
Sigh. Just let it be Hook.
- The Patriarchy (AEW World Trios Champions) vs. Bang Bang Gang vs. House of Black vs. Wild Card winners
This is way harder to call since it’s all heels, for the most part. The Wild Carders (which you can look up online) could take it, but it could also be another sneaky win for Christian and his “family.” I’ll give it to the Wild Card guys since I need to balance out my heel victory picks.
- Swerve Strickland (AEW World Champion) vs. Bryan Danielson
Nope, I haven’t changed my mind since five minutes ago. Still going with Bryan here. Even if he’s not sticking around (or just sticking around for one more match) this event needs a big win. Ospreay winning will be notable but Bryan winning will make a few mainstream headlines.
Sadly, Bryan failing to capture the belt all these years didn’t quite work in AEW’s favor. There's a downside to being too selfless. AEW had homegrown stars beat Bryan back but it just didn’t resonate, and it often didn't feel believable.
(Last week, 70% of you voted for Bryan. Do you still feel the same way?)
To be clear: If Swerve wins, I’ll buy it. They’ve done a great job of making him a star capable of besting Bryan. But that’s not what the company needs right now. If this match, for whatever reason, doesn’t go on last then Swerve could take it. But if it’s the closer then Bryan needs all the confetti. We need a "feel good" send off not a somber one. We need eff yeah cheers, not nice try cheers. And we need to redeem last year's Punk debacle (and also the year before that's Punk debacle). All In can't just be a great show, it needs to have that one thing people are talking about with smiles on their faces.
A final note here: Opposite Momentum does have Bryan losing. Just FYI. This is the way of the world.
All In unleashes on August 25 at 6pm BST (British Summer Time). That's 1pm ET and 10am PT over here.
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